why are moms always trying to make other moms feel bad about how they are as people?
how often do we see articles and posts circulating around facebook and blogs and pinterest written by moms who have a thing or two to say? too often. pretty much you come across a new one every week. but they circulate so fast because moms can relate! i see a lot of "needed THIS today!!" or "she said exactly what i was thinking!!" shares with popular blog posts about moms basically judging other moms in defense of their post that was, also, a judgement on mothers.
like you've got a lady that's over here telling you to put your iphone down because basically your kid and the whole world is judging you about how bad you suck. and then here comes a super mom saying if you want to be on an iphone it's fine because you're probably working, right?! clearly she's the mom on the iphone "working"... haha i kid i kid. i work on my iphone, too. it's called snapchat.
and then you have a mom writing a post about how, in a nutshell, she's lazy and hates cleaning. but twists it into you can't have a clean house and happy kids because that's just impossible. like, impossible. how do you make memories when you're vacuuming?! the answer is simple, you don't. but here comes another super mom defending all the clean freaks out there with her own post about how just because her house is spotless doesn't mean her kids aren't unhappy. she's only happy knowing that her toilet is clean, what's so bad about that? and btw, sometimes she lets her kids go crazy. like letting them sit on the couch. or letting them help make cookies and not cleaning up drizzle until after the cookies are in the oven instead of following them around with a rag. memories.
and then posts about formula vs breastfeeding. or vaginal birthing vs cesarean. or public schooling vs home school. or organic vs non-organic. or helicopter parenting. or raising your kid vegan. or stay at home parenting vs working parents. cloth diapers vs disposable diapers. co-sleeping vs not co-sleeping. or god forbid the dreaded vaccination vs anti-vaccination.
moms (dads i'm not forgetting you, your time is coming) are always going to assume that whatever is best for their child, is best for yours too. they will always throw in their 2 cents, whether it's to your face while at the grocery store or online behind their computers. sometimes with honest and good intentions. but most times they're just being assholes because obviously they think your parenting is less than acceptable. and not just your parenting, but who you are as a person. like tattoo moms (holler). how are we going to teach our children morals when we have none? or moms with piercings (holler!). is that the kind of example we want to set for our sweet, beautiful, innocent babies? we have no respect for our bodies, so they won't either. or moms that occasionally let their kids have cake for breakfast (hollerrr) cause you're not in the mood to argue about why they freakin' can't have cake for breakfast. like, wow. you should be educated about diabetes because that's so unhealthy.
|| side note: i hate when someone tells you to "educate yourself" and "do some research". you know what trashy and classless phrase comes to mind when i hear that? ... fuck you... which wouldn't go well with the internet know-it-alls but that's what i'm thinking. end side note ||
you know those articles. i know you've at least come across one or two of them. and i know you've related and/or shared them somewhere on social media.
but you know what? we don't need this. none of us need this. the one thing we all have in common is we are all MOTHERS. we are mom, mama, mum, mommy. we all started off with a baby that we had absolutely no clue what to do with. but eventually we all found our own special way to care for it. we're a team! we shouldn't criticize because of our sub-categories, we should be praising them.
my friends know i'm not the nicest person.. i'm a bit of an asshole sometimes. or all the time i don't know. so what i'm saying is, is i can be better at what i'm preaching. and if i can do it, so can you.
i have a hard time going into a spotless house and saying something positive tho.. i usually spat out what do you do with your life besides clean? is this why your kids hate you? because that's not nice and i doubt all of their kids hate them.
so. moral of this post.. be nice to each other. please shut up with all the "dear mom on the iphone" bullshit. it's degrading and mean and you're being an asshole. be on your iphone, don't be on your iphone. vax, don't vax. let your kid eat off the floor or don't. it's nobody else's business and you damn well don't need clarification from a stranger.
disclaimer: i know i sound like one, but i am not a therapist. this advice is free. actually it's not advice, it's just ramble because i'm not a hypocrite.