Monday, January 27

go home fashion bloggers

i would bet that everyone follows a fashion blog or two.
maybe you read them, maybe you don't. but you're probably following some.

fashion bloggers are all the same.
i believe they all have just 1 goal: to post as many pictures of ONE outfit as they can.
they do great at it too. sometimes i'm really impressed! i counted 16 one time. S I X T E E N.
One outfit. 16 shots. 16...

you guys know what i'm talking about, i know you do. 

those outfits are totally inspirational too because every picture comes with a story.
and every story needs a good narrator.
so imma break down each of those stories for you..

first they talk about their day, family, tampons, their new fave coffee spot, whatever...
then they talk about their outfit, how they were inspired by "building it" & how you will be too.
then come the pictures.

part one: the necessary takes.
 one everyday smiling, popped knee, holding the bag, pretty background pose. and don't forget the sunglasses.

one cliche up close on the bag while still showing off the arm candy. so clever.

one oh look! this shirt has buttons on the back!

one shoe focus{mind the dirt, if you may}
i'm no professional "fashion blogger" but this should be your last image. right?
because everything else after this is just nonsense.

which brings me to...
part two: the nonsense.
 two here i am with my hand on my hip. i look hot, right?

two yeaaa, lemme switch my arm to the other side. tell me how cute my outfit is now that my hand is on my other hip.

 two i'll just sit right here & ponder life in the middle of my important fashion blog shoot thingy.

two but i'll smile too so you know how i look in my outfit smiling AND pondering.

two because this is an everyday stance for me so i'm glad it was candidly caught...

there is always a twist somewhere in a fashion post, which brings me to..
part three: Scenery change.
three whaaaa?! a bridge! my outfit looks different standing here, huh. i look good. probably better.

three be serious, em. this is serious. hand.. hip.. focus...

three i'll drop the hand.. the fuh am i looking at?

 three does it make the outfit look better if i'm looking down at my shoe? yes. obviously.

 three another close up of my bag w/o my hands because duh.
i'm not going to lie, i follow a fashion blog or two. i mean sometimes i can get outfit inspo.. but for the most part, i just want to count their pictures.

 photo EmilySignature_zps0043f664.png


  1. YOU ARE A FASHIONISTA! OH MY GOSH! where are the cameras when you step out of bed in the morning. Sigh if I only looked as good as you on a bridge. (follow follow follow)

  2. Seriously I adore you! That is way to close to reality and oh so funny! The hands on the hips, then the other hip happens way to often. Then the looking down at the ground?! Are you trying to avoid dog poop?! What!

  3. Ohmygod YES. I only follow one because she does everything but when she does 'outfit post's it drives me nuts. You're wearing the same damn outfit! I get it already!
    You go, girl.

  4. This is the best fashion post I've ever seen. Ever.

  5. I really love fashion blogs for inspiration BUT this is SO true. I think more than 4 pictures of the same outfit is definitely overkill.

  6. This is the greatest! Oh what I wouldn't do to have your sense of humor.... and your legs! :) Yup even though it is Winter and they are covered, I know how rocking they are!

  7. Dying!!!!!!!!!! I'm convinced that they use just a couple photos and then crop & zoom the crap out of them. #2 is my fave. You are one finee lady my friend!

  8. I just came across your blog and this is hilarious! I'm excited to follow along now :)

  9. Haha! This is like the best post ever! I freaking love it!

    1. Haha thanks girl! xoxoxo

      And if you're wondering why I'm only responding to you, it's because you're a "no-reply" blogger through your email. Gotta fix that lovey! I did a tutorial on it a while back. That way I can respond straight to your email instead of through here! :-)) Or don't. No biggie!

  10. You are hilarious!!! This made me laugh out loud. But really? You look HOT!

    PS - are you watching the Following this season?

    1. Who isn't watching the Following?? Sigh. Shameless follower here!

  11. it would have been a GOOD post if you have a pic with starbucks in the background...

  12. Hi there! Stopping by from the Blog Hop! Now following and would love if you'd consider following back :)

  13. I'm am rolling! THIS was great -hitting the nail on the head!!!! I needed this laugh too.
    But, heck -you look fabulous and those glasses. I love them. Great post!

  14. I LOVED this post! One of my favorites from you yet.
    But come on, those poses and your outfit? You look AMAZZZING. You definitely need to make a fashion blog.

    1. Do NOT insult me with an idea to start a fashion blog! ;-) Yuck! But thanks for flattering me with your sweet words, you're too nice ha. xoxo!

  15. You are hilarious! Ahhh, I've missed your blog, is that weird? I don't care. And, I can just point out that I really do LOVE your purse?

  16. Oh my gosh - so I'm totally busted blog stalking you (ran across your blog, so I must read as many posts as possible = blog stalking), but I HAD to comment on this post! TOO FREAKIN FUNNY. I love your honesty and sarcasm.